MOMENTS I HATE…..

1. That moment when the hairdresser gives you the worst hairdo/haircut ever…
-You walk out the salon and meet your boyfriend
-He tells you your hair is beautiful
-You look at him with narrowed eyes and design an elaborate plan to break up with his lying ass.

2. Moments when your new boyfriend shows up at your house.
-Your dad comes in and starts asking him questions about world peace and the high pregnancy rate in unmarried couples.
-He also asks your boyfriend to solve this equation 5y-*2(y-p)+ 0y-±5a.
-DAD!!!!!

3. Moments when on your way to class, you notice everyone staring.
-You wonder what’s happening..maybe you look extra good today.
-3 Hours later, you discover your extra lacy thong was stuck to your bag zipper. So you had a nice thong scarf on your bag.
-#buries head in sand#

4. Moments when your watching a risqué movie or music video in the night and your whole family decides to wake up and join you in the sitting room.
-P.S… the remote refuses to work at this point.
-#raised eyebrows#
-Stupid questions like “is that a whip” start coming up.

5. Moments when you’re walking on the road and a boy calls you like this- siiiiiiiiiiiii
#stupid noise razz boys make#
-You say “your mama” under your breath
-The boy hears you and threatens to rearrange your face in front of a huge crowd

6. Telling yourself you’ll never kiss your ex EVER again.
– He shows up after 2 years.
-You guys kiss like you’re on the titanic.
-He tells you he still loves you
-You dump your present boyfriend and run to Mr Ex like a HUGE fool.
-You break up after 2weeks.

7. Moments when Chelsea fc is about to score a goal…
-The light blinks
-You look up in fear, offer a prayer and continue watching
– The keeper’s hands are stretched to catch the ball…..the light goes off, OFF NEPA!!!!

8. Moments when you sleep off in WAEC oral english paper or 400level maths finals and wake up 15 minutes to the end
– *Whispering fiercely*, “THERESA, PASS YOUR PAPER”.
-*Attempts to grab paper*

9. Moments when your Boli(roasted plantain) falls on the road.
-You look around…no one in sight.
-*Now bending down and picking it*.
– Suddenly you hear laughter.

10. You finish your assignment after 5hours of research.
-You put it on a flash drive and try to print
-VIRUS!!!
-You delete virus
-GUESS WHAT, the virus was ur assignment
-You go to your laptop to resend it….this comes up when you turn on the laptop xxxx@@@o?ac5sgvs@@@@vs vdgdyfhd ERROR 505
-GRRRRR….****!!!!!!