Extra crap.

Last night, I was so bored that I called my friends Obiora, Eniola and Deola and decreed that we’d hang out today. Still in my autocratic mood, I told them we’d go to the beach. They gave excuses but when I promised I’d pay for everything, they said they’d come.

This morning, by past nine, I was at eniola’s house. We live close to each other and she has a car, so she’s my ride. After wasting much time ranting about her lack of an outfit for the beach, we finally leave.

We have an outing ritual where we meet Obiora at Rain-Oil petrol station, Cele. Today is no different. He is waiting for us in his car. He smiles, we exchange pleasantries and drive off in a mini convoy to Lekki to pick the last person, Deola.

The traffic is not much so we get there in no time. Deola runs out dragging some dude. We’re all standing by her gate and she does a quick introduction.
“You guys, this is Jide. Jide meet my friends”.
We mumble some words.
Deola comes over and whispers in my ear.
“Shebi you’ll pay for everyone, plus him?”.
I don’t want her to change her mind, so I say yes. She beams, gives me a hug and drags Jide into Eniola’s car which is bigger.
I get into Obiora’s car and we drive off to Oniru beach.

Halfway to the beach, Obiora’s phone rings. He has a spirited conversation with a certain somebody. He turns to me and says,
“Uyi is already there. You know her right? I invited her. Hope you don’t mind?”
Whoooo whhhhatttt? Another person? These thoughts race through my mind. I plaster a smile and say ok. I know Uyi. I’ve met her once or twice.

We arrive at the beach and find parking space. We go in and get seats at one of the bars there.
Eniola keeps looking around. Finally, she jumps up and runs to hug some chick. As they laugh excitedly, Uyi (obiora’s friend) walks in. Tousled hair and shorts to scramble a guys brain. She says hi in an offhand manner and goes to seat by Obiora.

Obiora and Uyi, Deola and Jide, Eniola and her random friend, me and ohhhh……NO ONE!. They’re all chatting with their partners while I look on. Occasionally, someone turns to ask me a question. I answer and soon after, i get kicked out of the conversation.

The empty bottles on the table are doubling and tripling. I check my purse, counting the one thousand naira notes subtlety. Uyi suggests that they all have barbecued chicken, they agree. This is because none of them are paying?.

Ten minutes later, sweat pouring, happy laughter erupting every once in a while, they spit out their bones. They all look happy. FREAKING HAPPY!!!!!..

Uyi and Jide start acting tipsy. Drinks are splashed, bottles broken, more drinks are ordered. Suddenly, Uyi stands and announces that she wants more chicken. The rest of my friends agree with her. AGAIN!!! They stand up to go to the barbecue stand.
I stand with them, then say I’m going to ease myself. They hardly notice as I walk off.

Some minutes later, I’m seated in a bus heading to Obalende. I smile evilly to myself.

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One thought on “Extra crap.

  1. Em chi …..baby….. when did this happen? And Uyi’s a guy. Lol. But really good stuff enjoyed it though I knw its a big fabrication of reality. You seem to be getting better and better. Good work.

    Like

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